November 16, 2021
Welcome to Episode 6 of Brief Talk, proudly brought to you by Everyday Lingerie Co. I'm, your host, Danielle Sady. Today, we're talking about a topic that I feel really needed its own episode, being the fact that we're a brand that is built on self-love and body positivity, inclusivity, and all of those things. I really wanted to take the time to have a chat about diet culture, and language in our home around body image. For anyone who has read my stories and my journey, I have been really clear about my journey with self-love and body positivity. Starting at a really early age, I looked different to my sisters. And I saw that as a weakness or a flaw within my makeup, my body. I spent many years worrying and really filled with self-doubt and questions about my worth as not only a woman but as a person in this amazing world, because I was plagued by so many things.
So many things that saw me look at myself that I wasn't worthy. I wasn't good enough. It's all great for me to now say that my weight doesn't equal my worth or any of those sayings that go with it. But it's taken me till I'm pretty much was in my forties before I could really understand that, feel that, believe that. And there's still definitely days where self-doubt creeps in, we're a little bit bloated or we haven't eaten right, or haven't exercised as much. And the past couple of years have been really challenging to stay on top of your ordinary routine that you would do as part of that. So I've done a lot of reflection personally. So for me, that reflection came from, what it was that I was believing that was wrong with me, where it came from and how it affected me. And a couple of things really stood out. And they actually came from my childhood.
So I had a great childhood and please don't take it any other way. But for me, there was words that were used in my childhood that would've spoken, either by adults or by fellow students at the school I went to. And I do remember those and they were quite hurtful and I didn't realize how much I actually hung onto those and had a belief for that. Starting really early on, there was an image of myself and two of my sisters. And I remember always looking at that image and the sadness that was there for me. It was this beautiful photo of my two sisters who're in a dress with the skirts pulled out and I'm in a pair of pants. And I remember crying that day that I wanted to wear a dress as well because I thought they look so beautiful.
Anyone who has older siblings, I don't know if you were the same as me, but I've always looked up to my sisters and really looked at them with so much love and admiration. I always looked at them with such amazement of what incredible women they were. And I never felt good enough next to them. Now that's not anything they did. That was just how I felt. So this photo for me, as much as it's a beautiful photo, it contained a lot of hurt. So I'm sitting there trying to pull on these trousers and open them up like the skirts that my sisters had. And I remember being absolutely miserable, crying my eyes out before that photo was taken because I wanted a dress. I wanted to be as beautiful and as feminine as them in it. That was one memory.
And then I kind of moved along and I remember hearing adults use words or sentences or phrases that I then carried with me to my much older self. Words like, puppy fat, large, oh she's so much heavier than her sisters. And so this comparison situation started occurring, not for anyone else, but in my head because I took on those words. That I didn't know the gravity of how much it affected me until much later in life. And looking back now, I go back to that young me with so much compassion and empathy, and I just want to give her a hug. I just want to tell her it's okay and that those words mean nothing. However, as a young person growing up and especially with what was portrayed in the media at that time, that was the phase in those eighties of waif-like models and the catchphrase from Kate Moss like, "Nothing feels better than skinny does."
Those things really resonated with me because it made me highlight again how different I was. And being different, I didn't see that as my superpower, it was about, I didn't fit in. I wasn't enough. I wasn't good enough. And coming through this journey and pregnancy really pushed me in a greater way to look at the human body and be in awe of how incredible, amazing it was. But it also allowed me to start loving my body. I am an older mother, I didn't have my child until I was pretty much 38. And classed as you know, a bit of a geriatric in the child birthing world. And so I monitored a bit more closely in these sorts of things. And throughout that time of going to my obstetrician and getting weighed in every single visit and doing all of these things.
I really began to eradicate the feeling I had towards a set of scales. That for me was personally, it wasn't about that, it was about, am I healthy, my child's healthy? Am I eating well? Am I giving enough so that my son could grow healthy and I could be the same and get through this journey? But again, it created a time when I would start reflecting. Many of you who are mums, I'd love to know your thoughts on that. Whether having a child, whether that created something for you, or whether it might be a niece or nephew, you start looking at the world in very different ways. Because not only do you get this privilege of seeing the world through your children's eyes or your nephew or your niece or your friend's child, whoever it may be, it also takes you then back to a place for you. And for me, I really looked at words and word associations.
And one of the rules I set up in my house was if you wouldn't say it to an adult, don't say it to my child. Whilst that might seem a little harsh. I felt that from the hurt and the things that I actually went through and the recollections I had of things that I took on board that really didn't need to be, I realized that I wanted to try and eliminate this for my child. There was one instance where someone came in and picked up my child was having a conversation and went, "Oh, aren't you a fat thing." That really got me, mama lion was coming out. And I did advise that person that we don't use the F word in our house. So for me, that it was more offensive than if they had sworn.
And I did have to have a conversation with that person. It was really rational and very civil and just calm, but it was, please understand that in my home, we don't judge anyone by appearances. That's really what it meant. Because if you think about it, I don't know how many of you have, but how many times have people made comments about children from an appearance perspective, because you see them in passing or for a few minutes, it's not actually about who that child is. And their appearance to be honest is irrelevant. If they're a healthy child, if they're a happy child, if all these amazing things that a child brings into our life, but yet we're giving them negative connotations with different words and associations with that and things potentially if they're said enough, that will resonate.
And so I've been thinking about doing this episode for quite some time because I wanted to raise the topic and really open the conversation up to find out more about the diet culture or the language used in your home growing up because the eighties was definitely different to the nineties. The nineties was definitely different to the 2000s, et cetera and going on. But I really want to get an understanding about how other people feel about it. And what has stuck with you from something that was said, or done and how we can really break the cycle, especially for the next generations. And I'd finished putting together my overview of this episode and I actually read an article by Khloé Kardashian.
And the article was talking about the same topic, which I thought was amazing because people often refer to her daughter, True as someone who's big. And she actually stated that she corrects and says to them, "Do you mean she's tall?" As she is quite tall for a child her age. And I thought it was for me something, I had only thought of it from such a small perspective, but it's something that's clearly going across in our culture. The fact that we think it's okay to comment on the size or whatever of a child, but with words that have such a negative connotation and can have implications. For me, I know it had implications. It had implications for me on what I thought of my worth. And so I'm not saying that we can't use those words, but I want to be mindful of them, so I give my son and my step kids the best experience.
Now, my older stepdaughters are at that age where they've hit teenage years, one's right in the midst of it and one's coming into it. And I know from conversations I've had with them, the challenges that they've faced around how they feel, homeschooling, or on a zoom session and the consciousness that comes into that from a way that they perceive that they look or they're worth. And it really, again, highlighted the need for us to think about how we're speaking to each other. It comes back to that beautiful style Canteen, a jumper, "Be Kind, It's Gangster." And it just to me is something we need to talk about more, we need to think about. So I think with this platform of social media, it's a great place for us to raise the subject and highlight it and talk about it. And even if it just makes someone think, from what I've been through or what I saw with my son, comments about it, or my stepdaughters. It really is so in important to be mindful of what we say, that's what I believe.
So I've got a couple of people lined up that we're going to do some interviews with, hopefully, some lives at some point too, which will be really cool, to further this discussion about how they're working through that with kids in their home or how they've faced it in the media and their challenges with it. So we can continue to open the conversation and maybe some of these examples I've used might resonate with you or something that someone else says will. So I want to keep this conversation going. And I would love to ask you today, once you've watched this episode if you can comment below if you've seen examples of this or how we can put a positive spin on it. How we can do things differently, because I know I'm always looking to see how I can change it for my kids so they can move forward in a different way. So I'd love to hear your thoughts on that.
So please share in the comments below or DM us and tell us about your experience and how you are actually using that to change the narrative of the conversation, to change the connotations, to change the words, whatever angle it may be. We would love to hear about it and really get this conversation moving along.
So thank you so much for your time. Thank you for letting me share my journey with you. And look forward to seeing all your comments and hearing your feedback and furthering this conversation in later episodes. So I'm going to sign off for Episode 6. And see you at Episode 7, where we're going to talk about the ELC range in a bit more detail, how the styles actually differ between them. Just lighten it back up again before we can keep going with this conversation. Thank you so much for your time. It means a lot that you've joined us on this journey of Brief Talk and stay well.
November 30, 2021
November 26, 2021
*Post warning, Tigger Alert with discussions of eating disorders.
Are you following @annaliesegann on social media? I had the absolute pleasure around 3 years ago to meet Annaliese after we started chatting on Instagram and we clicked straight away, so it made sense when I started thinking about Brief talk episodes for me to reach out to Annaliese and see if she would be happy to sit down and chat we me regarding her journey with social media and work as a model and all that comes with that. Hope you love this episode and if you are not already following Annaliese definitely check out her page. Have a wonderful weekend and look forward to sharing another episode next week. Danielle xxx
November 19, 2021
Trying to find the right underwear size can be difficult due to different companies making different sizes. To make things easier we have created a step by step guide to take the guess work out of the equation.
Below we have measuring instructions with images to assist you.
All you need to do is take a couple of simple measurements; your waist, your lower waist and your hips. The best way to do this is by using a soft measuring tape and a mirror to ensure you are accurate. If possible stand in front of a mirror when taking your measurements to ensure that the measuring tape is also parallel to the floor and is flat.
Your waist is the natural in indentation above your hips or just below your rib cage (see image). Wrap the soft measuring tape around firmly without pitching your skin together – write this measurement down.
Your lower waist is approx. 12cm down from your waist. Take your measuring tape and run this down from your waist to 12cm (see image). Wrap the soft measuring tape around this area firmly without pitching your skin together – write this measurement down.
Now wrap the soft measuring tape around the fullest part of your hips, this is approximately 25cm below your waist (see image). Use the mirror to check that your measuring tape is completely straight and parallel to the floor – write this measurement down.
All you need to do is take a couple of simple measurements; your Full Bust and your Lower or under bust. The best way to do this is by using a soft measuring tape and a mirror to ensure you are accurate.
Your Full Bust is the fullest part of your bust (see image). Ensure that the measuring tape is completely straight and parallel to the floor. Wrap the soft measuring tape around firmly without pitching your skin together – write this measurement down
The Lower or Under bust is measured by wrapping the measuring tape around your rib cage directly under your bust (see image). Wrap the soft measuring tape around firmly without pitching your skin together – write this measurement down
|Full Bust Measurements (cm)||81-87||87-93||93-99||99-105||106-114||115-123||124-130||131-137|
|Lower or Under Bust Measurement (cm)||61-67||67-73||73-79||80-86||87-39||94-100||100-106||107-113|
|Waist Measurement (cm)||75||80||85||90||95||100||110||115|
|Lower Waist Measurement (cm)||90||95||100||105||110||115||120||125|
|Hip Measurement (cm)||95||100||105||110||115||120||125||130|
|USA||4 to 6||6 to 8||8 to 10||10 to 12||12 to 14||14 to 16||16 to 18||18 to 20|
|UK||6 to 8||8 to 10||10 to 12||12 to 14||14 to 16||16 to 18||18 to 20||20 to 22|
|EUROPE||34 to 36||36 to 38||38 to 40||40 to 42||42 to 44||44 to 46||46 to 48||48 to 50|
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