How we can support other women and stand up to domestic violence in Australia

March 23, 2020

How we can support other women and stand up to domestic violence in Australia

With all the madness going on right now, and the very real idea that we will likely soon be self-isolating (or already are), it’s more important than ever to take a minute to reflect on the women around us who may not feel safe in their own homes.

DV service providers are bracing for a spike in abusive incidents as more people are encouraged to stay home.

The ELC business and brand is founded on the sisterhood - looking out for each other and loving each other, and I have been so saddened to hear of the tragic cases of domestic violence that we’ve already seen this year.

As of 24 February, NINE women in Australia have lost their lives to domestic violence. That means we’re averaging one a week.

If you think it doesn’t affect you, that couldn’t be further from the truth. One in four women have experienced some type of abuse from a current or former partner since the age of 15. This means it is statistically very likely that you actually know multiple women who have been abused.

The thing is, it’s not always obvious. Often it is a huge surprise to everyone when it finally comes out. Sometimes they seem like the perfect couple. Until they’re not.

What actually is domestic violence?

Lifeline says abuse is when someone who has a close personal relationship with you makes you feel afraid, powerless, or unsafe. It can be physical, but can also be emotional and psychological.

Anyone can experience domestic and family violence. It happens across communities, ages, cultures and sexes, though most often to women and children.

Do you know someone who is experiencing domestic violence? Here’s what you can do.

If you suspect a friend, family member or co-worker is a victim of DV, please don’t assume it will work itself out. It’s hard to get involved in something so personal, but you can’t always wait until the person asks for your help. She may be ashamed, confused, or afraid.

Domestic violence isn’t a “private matter.” It’s a crime, so we can’t look away any more.

Watch for signs that something is wrong.

These could be anxiety around her partner, unexplained bruises, increased isolation, ending phone calls when partner comes into the room, and controlling behaviours from her partner (i.e. making her leave her job or go home early). Noticeable changes in behaviour or personality.

Listen to what she isn’t saying.

Did you hear about the emergency 911 operator who fielded a call from a woman insisting on ordering a pizza? He worked out that the woman on the other end of the line was actually in danger, and he sent her help, possibly saving lives with his quick thinking.

Be there to support her unconditionally

If you don’t feel you can ask outright if she is OK, then try bringing up the subject of domestic violence in a more general way, saying you are very concerned about what’s happening to women in Australia. See how she reacts. Let her know you are there for her if she ever needs anything at all. Give her your number if she doesn’t have it.

If she doesn’t engage, don’t give up. It takes a lot of courage to admit to it. Keep checking, and don’t assume it’s fine.

If she does confide in you, please believe her.

Listen without judging and make sure you are in a safe place. Don’t criticise her if she is not ready to leave yet. It is often more complicated than just packing a bag.

If she is ready, help her to make a safety plan.

Outline the steps she can take to leave. If you feel out of your depth, then encourage her to reach out to a dedicated service provider that can support her. Offer to be with her while she calls. If you are ever afraid, call 000.

Here are some resources:

Other women are going to be crucial in curbing this horrible statistic.

We have to protect each other. Open our eyes and our hearts and ask questions that make us a little uncomfortable.

Mamas, please teach your sons (and daughters) what consent means. Model to them what a strong, healthy relationship looks like. Talk to them gently about domestic violence (if they’re ready) because it has been hidden for far too long.

If we come together, we can be so powerful.

Please look after each other. Support your sisters. Because this can happen to anyone.

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.” – Margaret Mead

Lots of love,

Danielle XXX

And please remember, if you are experiencing abuse or violence, it is not your fault. Domestic violence is a crime, and it is the abuser who is responsible.

If this brings up issues for you, please call Lifeline: 13 11 14




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Sizing

Trying to find the right underwear size can be difficult due to different companies making different sizes. To make things easier we have created a step by step guide to take the guess work out of the equation.

Below we have measuring instructions with images to assist you.  

Finding your size in our Underwear Range:

All you need to do is take a couple of simple measurements; your waist, your lower waist and your hips. The best way to do this is by using a soft measuring tape and a mirror to ensure you are accurate.  If possible stand in front of a mirror when taking your measurements to ensure that the measuring tape is also parallel to the floor and is flat.

Measurement 1: Your waist

Your waist is the natural in indentation above your hips or just below your rib cage (see image). Wrap the soft measuring tape around firmly without pitching your skin together – write this measurement down.

Measurement 2: Your Lower Waist

Your lower waist is approx. 12cm down from your waist.  Take your measuring tape and run this down from your waist to 12cm (see image). Wrap the soft measuring tape around this area firmly without pitching your skin together – write this measurement down.  

Measurement 3: Your hips

Now wrap the soft measuring tape around the fullest part of your hips, this is approximately 25cm below your waist (see image). Use the mirror to check that your measuring tape is completely straight and parallel to the floor – write this measurement down.

 

 

Finding your size in our Crop Top Bralette Range:

All you need to do is take a couple of simple measurements; your Full Bust and your Lower or under bust. The best way to do this is by using a soft measuring tape and a mirror to ensure you are accurate.

Measurement 1: Your Full Bust

Your Full Bust is the fullest part of your bust (see image). Ensure that the measuring tape is completely straight and parallel to the floor. Wrap the soft measuring tape around firmly without pitching your skin together – write this measurement down

Measurement 2: Your Lower or Under Bust

The Lower or Under bust is measured by wrapping the measuring tape around your rib cage directly under your bust (see image). Wrap the soft measuring tape around firmly without pitching your skin together – write this measurement down

 

ELC Size 8 10 12 14 16 18 20 22
Full Bust Measurements (cm) 81-87 87-93 93-99 99-105 106-114 115-123 124-130 131-137
Lower or Under Bust Measurement (cm) 61-67 67-73 73-79 80-86 87-39 94-100 100-106 107-113
Waist Measurement (cm) 75 80 85 90 95 100 110 115
Lower Waist Measurement (cm) 90 95 100 105 110 115 120 125
Hip Measurement (cm) 95 100 105 110 115 120 125 130
USA 4 to 6 6 to 8 8 to 10 10 to 12 12 to 14 14 to 16 16 to 18 18 to 20
UK 6 to 8 8 to 10 10 to 12 12 to 14 14 to 16 16 to 18 18 to 20 20 to 22
EUROPE 34 to 36 36 to 38 38 to 40 40 to 42 42 to 44 44 to 46 46 to 48 48 to 50

 

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